Helping your Husband, Wife, or Partner with Substance Use Disorder

Addiction impacts people and families from all walks of life. Watching someone you love struggle with substance use disorder (SUD) can feel isolating. It’s important to know that many resources are available to help you help your spouse or partner find the care they need.

Several types of addiction treatments are available, from inpatient programs to outpatient services that meet people where they are in their recovery journey.^{1 p. 5} Taking care of yourself while helping your partner is also vital. A loved one’s addiction can take a toll on your mental health and well-being. Putting your health and safety first as you support your partner through recovery can make you both stronger.

How to Help My Spouse or Partner With Drug or Alcohol Addiction?

You may be wondering how to help your partner with addiction. There isn’t a straightforward way to handle this issue, but there are many ways to offer support and encouragement. Most importantly, you must realize that you can’t change your partner. Recovery is a very personal experience. Your significant other will only take their alcohol addiction seriously when they’re ready to change.

As a partner or spouse, being educated about addiction and treatment is essential. The more you understand addiction, the easier it will be to offer support and hold your partner accountable when necessary. You should also set boundaries to keep yourself safe and avoid enabling your spouse. It can be easy to give in because you love your partner and don’t want to see them suffer. However, having proper boundaries, like walking away if things get abusive and refusing to support their addiction, will keep you safe along the way.

If your loved one is ready to seek treatment, encouraging them to contact a mental health professional is a great start. An addiction specialist can help your partner determine the best level of care for them and create an individualized plan to start treatment. Offering to help your partner find a suitable rehab will further show you’re committed to being there with them through their journey.

How to Get Your Partner or Spouse into Rehab

Attending rehab is a difficult choice that takes a lot of introspection. As much as you want to help your partner, forcing them into treatment may not always be effective. People often have to be willing to change to engage fully in treatment. But that doesn’t mean you can’t be there when your partner is ready.

Build up a strong level of knowledge about addiction. That way, when your spouse comes to you for help, you’ll be prepared. You’ll be able to show your partner how much you care by helping them find appropriate treatment and being part of a solid support system.

Can I Visit My Partner or Spouse at Rehab?

Keeping in touch with your partner or spouse at rehab can help them feel grounded. Whether you can visit them while in treatment can vary greatly depending on the program your partner attends. Some rehabs offer couples or family therapy to help rebuild your relationship while in treatment. These therapeutic approaches focus on educating partners on the underlying causes of addiction, improving communication, and helping you create a plan with your partner to promote long-term recovery.¹

How to Support Your Partner or Spouse in Recovery

You can support your partner or spouse in recovery in many ways during and after rehab. Working on your own well-being and focusing on self-care can help you be a supportive role model for your partner. As you get stronger, it can motivate them to follow suit.

Supporting Your Spouse Before and During Addiction Treatment

Before your spouse leaves for treatment, offer a reassuring word. Let them know you’re in their corner and only want to see them healthy. As your partner progresses, you can offer support by keeping clear boundaries. Tell them that as much as you want to see them get better, it’s vital for you to be your best. Try to focus on yourself while keeping their unique needs in mind.

You can also offer support by attending rehab therapy sessions to better your relationship. The communication and coping skills you gain in therapy can help you understand each other and strengthen your bond.

Supporting Your Spouse After Rehab

Completing rehab is only the first step in recovery.¹ Creating a safe, supportive environment at home can aid in keeping your partner motivated and dedicated to sobriety.¹ Gather your loved ones to form a solid support system your partner can rely on when in need. Find resources for addiction aftercare programs so your partner can continue building relapse prevention skills. Most importantly, keep healthy boundaries and hold your partner accountable.

Helping Your Spouse or Partner Take the First Step Toward Recovery

If you or a loved one is struggling with addiction, help is available. Reach out to your provider or a mental health specialist for an addiction assessment. Your provider can help gauge the severity of your addiction and refer you to appropriate treatment programs.

American Addiction Centers (AAC) can also offer guidance through our helpline. Whether you’re figuring out how to pay for treatment or have questions about your insurance, our admissions navigators are ready to help. They can verify your insurance benefits and connect you with rehabs right for you so you can get the help you need. Contact AAC at to embark on your recovery journey.